Tuesday, March 23, 2010


I got an email today.
From Holt!
I opened it and there was an attachment!
Suddenly, my excitement turned to sadness when I saw what it was.

It was my kids' relinquishment decree.

This just kills me.
Somewhere in Ethiopia three witnesses had to show up to verify their birth-father's story.
This is not a happy document.
This is a necessary document.
It does not make me happy to have it.
My holding this document means someone had to sign it.
This is another aspect of the paradox of adoption.
Such an amazing gift for our family... such incredible pain in another.
How is it possible to grieve for someone you do not know and have never seen?

We (anyone able to read this) are incredibly blessed.

And we complain about our old cars.
We complain about the price of fuel.
We complain about our slow internet connection.
We complain about needing to go BACK to the grocery store AGAIN this week.

We are blessed to be able to have transportation.
We are blessed that we can work, have income and afford to drive.
We are blessed to live in such a technologically advanced society that we can use the internet for recreation!
We are blessed to be able to drive down the street and pick up food for our family with little to no inconvenience.

I was given proof of this today.
Go hug your family and thank God for your MANY blessings today.


  1. SO true. We are incredibly blessed!

    But keep in mind those 3 are blessed to get to have you for their mommy. :)

    Our God turns ashes into beauty! (Is. 61:3)

  2. Isaiah 61:3 is this week's memory verse for my Beth Moore Bible study, and I thought of that, too. Beauty for ashes.

    You are so very right; it's all about perspective and we are SO very blessed. Lately my own complaints center around the fact that we cannot start the process yet, but all in His timing. My heart is so heavy with the recent news of the USE's investigations and the road ET adoptions may be heading, and as sad as it is to have such a necessary document, I am so thankful for ethical agencies like Holt and the fact that you know your three precious little ones will know their truthful story.

    Praying for you guys as you wait!


  3. right there with you! It was heart breaking when I read ours. But also cool that we have real names of people that were part of our child's life!


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