Allie

12 years ago this evening I had a baby girl!

She was a tiny little thing!

As mom's of two or more can attest...

seeing your first (who you thought was still a baby) next to your second (actual infant baby) is a frightening thing! I was sure "baby" Paul was going to squish her with his moose-like girth.

He didn't.

Now, my sweet baby girl is TWELVE years old! How did this happen?

We have had a good 12 years so far!

There was the time when she was a baby that I dyed her, myself and the couch purple with Gentian Violet trying to cure her thrush! 

She fed a stray dog the cookies from her walker tray, assuring we then kept the mangy dog...

and named him Cookie. 

(And took him to the vet for that mange. Yes, literally a mangy dog.)

There was the time she was in her Aunt Dawn's wedding!

She was around two.

She did great in rehearsal...

then had a meltdown at the back of the church.

And got carried down the aisle.

By me.

In my fancy dress.

With a baby on my hip.

There was her "beach dress" that she wore until it totally lost its ability to act as a dress.

It was a pastel green and white floral print, halter top with smocking.

She wore it nearly every day! 

Now her "beach dress" is her lime green hoodie. 

She loves lime green!

And zebra print!

She is super smart, witty and clever!

She comes up with the funniest things!

Most of the time its appropriate timing on the funny things.

She is a pre-teen now, with all the joy and trials that brings.

She is growing into a beautiful young woman right before my eyes.

She is at that magical in-between age.

For her birthday she wants a Pillow Pet...

And Victoria's Secret PINK perfume.

Yep... she is a Tween!

My beautiful Allie Cat... I am so blessed to be your mom! When you were a baby I was nervous because you were SO tiny and fragile. Now I am nervous because I know our years are numbered before you will be all grown up and won't need me so much anymore. I will always be here for you.

When you are all grown up...

When you find that one person we are already praying for and you want to marry him...

When you have your own tiny baby...

When that tiny baby grows into a pre-teen (and cries about her hair...).

I love you, sweet baby girl!

~Mommy

Today

Today I am waiting.

Waiting for 12:00 so my work week is over...

Waiting to hear back from Congressman Blackburn's office about my USCIS paperwork...

Waiting for news from my baby sister who is in labor right now having my first niece! Baby Sister's blog

Waiting for spring to get here so I can de-germify my house and get rid of the strep-bugs that plague us...

Waiting for a call back from a grant application...

Just WAITING.

Documents

I got an email today.
From Holt!
I opened it and there was an attachment!
Suddenly, my excitement turned to sadness when I saw what it was.

It was my kids' relinquishment decree.

This just kills me.
Somewhere in Ethiopia three witnesses had to show up to verify their birth-father's story.
This is not a happy document.
This is a necessary document.
It does not make me happy to have it.
My holding this document means someone had to sign it.
This is another aspect of the paradox of adoption.
Such an amazing gift for our family... such incredible pain in another.
How is it possible to grieve for someone you do not know and have never seen?

We (anyone able to read this) are incredibly blessed.

And we complain about our old cars.
We complain about the price of fuel.
We complain about our slow internet connection.
We complain about needing to go BACK to the grocery store AGAIN this week.

We are blessed to be able to have transportation.
We are blessed that we can work, have income and afford to drive.
We are blessed to live in such a technologically advanced society that we can use the internet for recreation!
We are blessed to be able to drive down the street and pick up food for our family with little to no inconvenience.

I was given proof of this today.
Go hug your family and thank God for your MANY blessings today.

How to turn a bonus room into a girls bedroom 101

You may or may not want to follow these directions verbatim.

Suit yourself!

1. Discuss color schemes for weeks. 

(Try fruitlessly to mesh the wants of two girls with one dad who hates to paint.)

2. Decide a three-day weekend is the time to finally get started.

(because really... when else are you going to do it?)

3. Begin by sorting toys and making one large pile for garage sale stuff.

(May 1st...)

4. Observe that garage sale pile is running over into "keep" pile... move "keep" pile.

(Consider moving "keep" pile into "sale" pile... decide against it.)

5. Spend 6 hours in the bonus room before deciding 

tomorrow's weather will be great for this project.

(*YAWN!*)

6. Saturday morning, wake up and begin again. 

(after several cups of coffee)

7. Decide to take a box to the garage for the sale.

8. Husband observes garage and deems it unpleasant.

(uh oh.)

9. Husband decides that first, we must clean out the garage.

(Double uh-oh.)

10. Drag everything onto the driveway.

11. Sweep garage.

12. Put everything back, piling garage sale stuff in centralized location.

(stop to take 13 year old to baseball practice.)

13. Make many trips up and down 2 flights of stairs from bonus room to garage.

(Who needs a stair machine?)

14. Husband starts sanding spackled nail holes.

(send hubby to pick up son from baseball practice)

15. Move TV into master bedroom.

(stop to help husband carry sectional down stairs and to the garage. Sleeper sofa included.)

16. Decide master bedroom must be rearranged.

(to make room for P90x... reluctantly.)

17. Realize rearranging master bedroom involves cleaning out from under the bed.

18. Find more garage sale stuff.

(lots more.)

19. Realize library's "fill-a-bag" sale was not kind to your dust bunny allergies.

(WHAT was I THINKING?)

20. Against better judgment, send hubby and girls to Home Depot for paint.

(File this under "and you didn't see this coming?")

21. Finish moving furniture around master bedroom.

(Thankful for those sliding furniture mover things from Walgreens!)

22. Try to act happy when kids and hubby return with Barbie-meets-Pepto-swirled-with-bubblicious-PINK paint... when you were hoping for a blue or purple tone.

23. Begin racking your brain for ways to color coordinate the second shade Hubby chose, a strange beige color, with the bright pink.

24. Decide that certainly they make a fabric which will incorporate both colors and decide to hunt until you find it and make it into curtains and pillows. 

25. Go help paint.

(still unable to believe you are consenting to put this color on the walls...)

26. Realize edging paint job was done by hubby, not 8 year old daughter.  
Oops.

27. Begin to feel that 9:30pm is feeling more like midnight.

28. Decide that a shower sounds like a great plan BEFORE bed.

29. Try to not fall asleep standing in the shower.

30. Get to bed.

We then decided that Sunday would be a family day - not a painting day.

Tonight we will paint some more.

Today I have some better ideas about how to blend the colors together which 

will make me happier with the choices... 

and ultimately... 

it's the girls' room and they wanted PINK. They sure got it!

Flow Charts

I would like a flow chart.

I would like to be able to post it on my fridge and see from beginning to end, where we are in our journey.

Right now things are somewhat unpredictable in Ethiopia.

We don't know for sure if we can get a court date in this "grace period", but we are sure hoping it works out.

Our agency has said that we must have our 171H (see prior post on getting fingerprinted) before we go to court, since they are concerned about our approval. Not super sure why they are so concerned, but they are, so we wait.

From what I have read elsewhere, the issue of the children being legally adopted in Ethiopia and then not claimed by their parents has happened many times. Maybe even more than 50 times. These are children who are quite literally STUCK now since their new legal parents do not claim them. I just can't get over those numbers.

So, yes... I understand the two-trip requirement. I really do! Being able to meet and get to know your potential child/ren before going to court is a very big positive in an adoption! If we are required to travel twice, we will pray for the best, we will pray for the money, and we will pray that our children -being some of the first to have their parents arrive, meet them and then leave - -will understand and that they would not be further damaged by the sudden change in procedure. Thankfully, our children are NOT at the Addis care center where they would partake in the going-home ceremonies twice a month. Therefore, they have not seen this happen over and over again for the past 7 months. I can just pray that if we are required to make two trips that they will not be moved to that center until just before we arrive.

I feel like I am rambling...

I am going to DO something today. I am going to clean out the closet in the bonus room, get that room ready to paint, and be productive in the things I CAN control (somewhat).

I can get my home ready for our new kids.

I can pray for them.

I can pray for our process.

I can pray that USCIS would approve our paperwork super fast.

I can pray for the others in this journey along with me.

I can focus on my sweet baby sister who is now a week over-due, (two if you count like normal 28-day people) and pray that by first niece will be here soon... Melissa's blog
I love you Mo! Remember, no woman has EVER stayed pregnant forever. She will be here soon... my money is still on Sunday. She just wants to be a spring baby! ;)

Off to get my shoes on and get to work!