Things I'd like to say to homeschooling moms

FINE. Reposting.

**EDITED TO SAY:**
I had no intentions of offending any schooling-option-mommas out there with this post.
I wholeheartedly agree that there are those of you out there who homeschool who would NEVER think of degrading those making a different choice than you. This post is not about you.
However, judging by the response of those who have kids in public school, you are in the minority. Public school parents DO hear this stuff A LOT. Take it for what it's worth... not trying to offend - simply open the eyes of those who may not understand that what they say - while true and not meant in a mean way - can cause pain to others.
**************************************** carry on.


90% of the time when someone finds out we have 12 kids they follow that up with
"I bet you homeschool, too."
It's more of an accusation than a question.
Like 12 kids = homeschool family.

I'm here to say...
tomorrow is the first day of school!
Public school.
We have homeschooled before... a year here, a year there...
but ultimately... it's not the best choice for our family at this time.

So... here's 10 things I want homeschool moms to know, 
from me - a public school mom: 

(forgive the "we/us"... I did not take a scientific poll and I don't speak for all public school moms.)

1. You guys tend to give us an inferiority complex. Or maybe that's just me.

2. We hate it when you call it "government school". There's an indoctrination-undertone there that's just icky. It's elitist and backhanded. Please stop. Yes, we know the government funds schools with tax dollars, but the common term is "public school".

3. Just because we send our children to school doesn't mean we don't love them and miss them during the day. For some of us it's just the best choice for our families. For some of us, our husbands don't support our desire to homeschool. For others of us, our children's personalities would make any learning impossible at home or drive us to drinking. Or both.

4. Does your 8 year old really prefer Tom Sawyer over Captain Underpants? Really?

5. If I promise not to presume that because you homeschool you make all your own clothes, never watch tv, sing from hymnals instead of the radio, all play violin or harp or piano or all three, and that your kids are going to someday implode and rebel...... would you please not presume that I don't homeschool because I'm just "less than" or that I don't love my kids as much as you do yours?

6. Most of us wholeheartedly agree that under a condensed setting in a home environment, an entire 7 hour school day can become a 2-3 hour school day with the same amount of learning. You don't need to convince me that you can get done in half the time what it takes the teacher in school the full day to do. Breathe in... breathe out. I'm okay, you're okay. Okay?

7. When we complain about purchasing school supplies or homework that takes till bedtime or permission slips or parent/teacher conferences or packing lunches and you come back with "whew! So glad we homeschool!" we kinda want to kick you in the shins. Not with steel-toe boots on, maybe with our flip flops and not hard... just enough to get your attention. Yeah, we get it. You don't have to sit up for 3 hours trying to re-teach Algebra to a kid who isn't understanding it from his teacher.... and you don't have to sign permission trips to anything... and you can serve cereal for lunch if you want. Let's put that phrase into the category "things to say inside your head, or at the homeschool convention".

8. Whenever something bad happens in a school - abuse, shootings, violence, etc... and all the homeschoolers start up with the above statement ("whew! So glad we homeschool!") it's actually pretty harsh. Yes, we know your kids aren't in the schools. But ours are. And we love them A LOT and we totally lose our ability to focus on anything of minor importance whenever something horrible happens - even on the other side of the country.

9. Christians send their kids to public school, too.
9b. Most teachers are NOT evil, brain-washing, communist, liberal, sex-ed instructing, Bible-hating bigots. They really aren't. I've been blessed over the years to have my kids in classrooms with teachers who go to our church, participate in Bible study before school, tell my children (without fear of repercussion) that they are praying for our family, and who have cried with me during difficult times. I have had teachers where I can send a quick text or email saying "may the force be with you. bad morning." and they know that kiddo may come in like a whirling dirvish. They are kind when they email or text back "mental adjustment happened between your door and our door... no worries."
Sometimes Christian homeschoolers like to drop Bible verses when speaking with Christian public-schoolers. Sometimes I wonder if they think that "if I just give them *my* take on 'train up a child' then they will burn their car-rider pick-up tags and join the HSLDA!"

10. Sometimes public school is a GOOD option... even when compared to home school. I'm looking forward to the school year for many reasons. Our three newest boys NEED to be separated to learn how to learn and be their own person apart from the three-some that they have NEEDED to be for quite some time. They need to be kids. In a class with other kids. Having fun. Showing off on the playground. Not trying to be the dad. Learning to speak English and learning social queues. This is a good thing for them. My little three need some time with Mom without the big kids around. My bio kids need separation from always being one of 12. In their classroom - they can just be an individual. They need the normalcy of a classroom routine free from attachment and therapeutic parenting and meltdowns over incorrect translations. They need to be with friends and have a break from feeling responsible for someone's ability to learn the language.

Let's lose the mommy-hierarchy/pecking order and just love each other because we have much in common. We know what it's like to be up most of the night with a sick child. We know what it's like to bandage boo-boos and sneak a cookie before dinner (but don't tell the other kids!). We have scrubbed our fair share of toilets, sinks and floors and we have all had a child turn up their noses at something we've served them to eat. We have all fallen short, we have all had proud-mommy moments. Any mommy out there who gets out of the bed, does her best to train up her children in the way they should go, and lives to try it again the next day... deserves respect.
No matter where her kids learn long division.