Printed!

This past Friday (3/12) when our dossier made it to Ethiopia, we were also contacted by our social worker. She said that due to the new regulations (see prior post on New News from ET), she wanted us to NOT wait for our official fingerprinting appointment, but to instead just "show up on Monday and ask nicely" to get it done.

Um... okay. This is a government agency. They have intimidating initials (USCIS). They wear uniforms with patches and have warnings on the doors about not using recording equipment inside. These folks don't "do" fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants.

So, of course, Paul and I showed up Monday.

It went AWESOMELY well! They were super efficient, very friendly, and we were in and out in under 15 minutes! (We can only dream that someday the DMV or Postal Service would work like this!)

I called to let Holt know and they were glad to hear we were successful in getting that done!
I spoke with the social worker who had given us our rogue assignment and she was also glad and said that she will start her email campaign this coming week to check on the status.
I sent an email to the Memphis office asking nicely (half begging) for them to expedite our application.
I got a reply back that they always expedite.
(By definition, this can not possibly be true. Always expediting is not possible. That would be your normal speed. There would still be room to make something go faster if this was your normal speed. Should I send a dictionary?)

Anyway... I am trying not to think about it as the days go on.

Today, I am that much closer to our babies and they are closer to being ours!

Today, our oldest did a presentation for his class. The assignment was to choose a charity or non-profit and try to convince the class that they should spend their money on that person's choice. He and his group chose Holt. He showed photos of his newest siblings! He talked about their programs to keep families together! He is said to have done an awesome job!

He. Wore. A. Suit.
Yes... he also had on a baseball hat and high-tops... but he wore a SUIT, people!

It's in there. It's in their hearts. My own children are seeing the need and are vocalizing their heart for the least of these!

I love my family!
(even more than the Nashville USCIS office!)

Dictatorship

To my children,

Tonight an argument erupted between two of you and you decided to use some inappropriate words – words that are not allowed in our house.

You have been punished by losing the privilege of having a cell phone until I see attitude improvements 

(which, at this point, may be when your phones are rendered obsolete).

This brought about lots of tears and an angrily spewed "it's like we live in a dictatorship!" and "It's not FAIR!"

Sweethearts, I hate to be the one to break it to you… but life is not fair and you DO live in a dictatorship.

This is not a democracy.

You do not get a vote.

Dad and I are the "dictators".

We make the rules.

There is no other option until you move out and create your own little dictatorship.

This is the way it is and I am not sorry.

You are barely teenagers.

You do not have the mental or emotional capabilities to make decisions about important things in your lives.

I know you believe that you are fully capable of being tiny little adults, but until you have a job and are on your own – you live under our set of rules.

This is life.

Things happen that you do not like and it is our job to teach you how to roll with those punches.

Things happen that are not fair and it is our job to teach you that sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.

You may not always be able to control your circumstances, but you can always control your responses.

Today, you did not do a good job of controlling your reactions.

I am disappointed.

In this house, in this family, in our little corner of the world – we do not put each other down.

We do not call one another names that hurt.

We do not use our words to harm others.

THIS is a safe place when the rest of the world teaches you all about life.

So, sweethearts, I took away your cell phones.

You will survive.

I made it 26 years without a cell phone – you will make it for a few days.

You may have to speak to your friends as they sit near you on the bus rather than text them.

You will survive. I promise.

One thing I can guarantee you – if you choose to continue spewing meanness towards your family you will live a friendless, media-free, house bound, Amish existence.

Guaranteed.

New News from ET

Taking a queue from my sister Melissa, I am going to attempt to put on my "positive pants" about this situation since I know that

A. Being frustrated, annoyed, angry and generally sad about it will do me no good and will not change a darn thing.

B. Trying to think of something positive to say will stretch my brain and may get my forehead out of its now-near-permanently wrinkled state. 

NEWS:

Ethiopian High Courts have announced a quick little blurb today that states in a nutshell that all adoptive families who do not have a court date scheduled as of today will be required to attend court personally instead of using the agency's attorney, with our POA, who is in Ethiopia.

Positive Pants:

Traveling prior to the visa appointment will allow our kids to come home on an IR-4 visa (I believe thats the right one) which basically says they get to become US citizens upon setting foot in the USA. Now families have to file a lot of paperwork once home to get their kids recognized as citizens.

FRUSTRATION:

An already expensive venture just got MORE expensive by adding another travel date, another hotel stay, another stay in Ethiopia with meals and such, and the logistics of providing for the kids at home.

Positive Pants:

Yes, it is expensive and that "grand total" number is never set in stone until you are home and done with the processing. This is just one more twist and turn along the adoption road. It's unexpected, but you can't get GPS-quality routing down the adoption road. And, in the grand scheme of things, what's another $3-$5K?

UNANSWERED QUESTIONS:

Will both parents have to travel for court? If so, that pretty much ensures that Paul and I both have to make both trips since neither of us alone could travel to bring home three preschoolers on a 20+ hour flight. Not knowing the answer to this not only leaves a question mark over our dollar signs, but the added frustration of feeling that if we had passed our committee the first time around (or even the second) our dossier could have been done faster and maybe we would have missed this new requirement. 

Positive Pants:

If everything happens for a reason, and I believe this is all in God's control... there must be some reason why our paperwork is on the path and with the timeline we have right now. If I trust Him for the calling, trust Him for the money, then...I have to also trust Him for the timeline. 

One more thing...

It seems that most of the information I am reading online is all happy-isn't-this-fabulous from the perspective of adoptive parents who are ALREADY HOME. While I love and respect those parents, I think they have a form of adoption "pregnancy amnesia". They have forgotten how the unexpected ups and downs affect everything. They have forgotten what it is like to wait.
They have their children home.
 I understand the reasoning behind this has to do with making sure the adoptions are all ethical and that parents are able to see the child/ren they are adopting before it is legal and nearly impossible to reverse. HOWEVER, when we entered into this process we were told Ethiopia was a one-trip country and that made it very appealing to us for several reasons. (Finances, planning, logistics with the rest of the kids, etc.) Changing the requirements for parents who have dossiers already turned in seems like a breach of contract or something, even though 

I know we never had a contract with the government in ET. 

Positive Pants

The Ethiopian government is within their rights to change the rules at any point they so desire. They can stop all together and close the country if they want - it has happened before (Guatemala). It hurts because my children are there and they have been waiting 6 months already and now, that wait is extended. 

I suppose if the option is two trips or a closed country... I would choose two trips in a heartbeat. 

Please pray for our finances. I am applying for every grant I can find, planning fundraisers and basically hoping to meet some wealthy benefactor who loves orphans and wants to see our three come home soon!

Now with this added trip, our expenses just went up.

The sweetest thing!

No, still no DTE today.

That's ok...

because I have the world's sweetest almost-12-year-old daughter!

Check out what I got yesterday!

She made the cover out of her own scrapbooking papers!
(Note the gold glitter glue "family"!)

(I can't figure out how to make the pictures in the right order with this blogger thing... so you will just have to be imaginative!)

 

NOT losing it...

Nope.

I'm good.

I am SO not losing my mind over here.

Know why I am NOT going crazy? 

Because another Waiting Child Program mom just heard her dossier made it to Ethiopia over the weekend...

And hers was approved the day after mine.

Yep. 

It's cool.

I'm good.

She is a super sweet mom over at www.mywaitingangel.blogspot.com waiting on a baby girl! I am happy for her... and ALL the other people I don't know about who are hitting milestones ahead of me!

Really!

I am!

I just want to know where my dossier is TODAY. 

That's all.