Feeding the crowd

When I write my "how to survive your first year of adoption" book (ha ha...)

there will be at least one chapter dedicated to meal times.

I wrote yesterday about "self-care" and on that list 

was the need to plan meals

so that I don't self-destruct.

The problem with "meals" at our house is that

my littles eat like Hobbits.

How do I mean?

Well...

"Hobbits eat at least seven meals known as breakfast, 

second breakfast, elevenses, luncheon, 

afternoon tea, dinner and supper."

Yep. Sounds like my children!

Breakfast - the meal eaten around 6am when I am getting the big 2 off to school.

Their bus comes at 6:40, so I have to prepare something FAST, 

and normally warm since it's dark and like 20 degrees outside at that time of "day".

Second Breakfast - the meal eaten around 7:30 when 

I am getting the middle 2 off to school.

Their bus comes at 8. This is a little more 

flexible and cereal is a common request.

Elevenses - Some sort of snack... which is actually not at 11, but more like 10.

Luncheon - Yeah... lunch. Around 11-11:30, depending on how soon

I can get my act together.

This usually leftovers from the night before, 

PB&J or something fast if they are cranky 

and need to go to bed ASAP.

 - - - Nap Time!! - - -

Afternoon Tea - Snack once they wake up from naps.

Dinner - The snack they think they should also get when 

the kids get home from school and are eating a snack.

Supper - Our ACTUAL dinner.

As you can imagine, it's difficult to plan meals, grocery lists, and budget on this type of schedule.

I like to keep lots of fruit in the house for those in-between meals/snacks, but that's not always possible without many, many trips to the store during the week. 

So for other Hobbit Mommies out there...

here are some of my meal/snack go-to items.

Breakfast/Second-Breakfast:

Other than cereal (which is normally the generic brand of O-shaped stuff),

we do scrambled eggs and cheese on flour tortillas (good on the run),

Egg sandwiches,

and sometimes a slice of apple with cinnamon-sugar 

rolled up in a crescent roll and baked.

These are our less-messy choices for school days.

Snacks before lunch and after nap:

You know those cute little bathroom cups 

that only hold about 2 oz of liquid?

Well they are my portion-control for snack time.

I fill them with O-cereal, pretzel sticks, a few animal crackers,

or whatever small snack food I have on hand.

Lunch:

As I said, a lot of days this is leftovers.

Some days, we need nap-time to come quickly...

and on those days I throw together a sandwich or tortilla roll 

and a small piece of fruit - 

sliced apples, orange slices, grapes, or half a banana.

Dinner:

Confession... I HATE dinner.

I hate cooking dinner when Paul is out of town.

I hate cleaning up after dinner and I would prefer to feed 

everyone ice cream and just be done with it.

However... I realize they need to eat an actual meal...

so I cook simple food for dinner.

Sometimes its convenient food like pizza, 

corn dogs (don't judge me), 

or nuggets...

other days its something requiring more effort 

than opening a bag from the freezer.

Some of my go-to dinner solutions are

Baked pasta (like ziti - but made with whatever I have on hand)

Roasted chicken with rice and vegetables

Tacos

Fajitas

Mexican "lasagna"

and

Fried Rice

 I should add the little note that

I can't eat gluten.

Gluten is in most of those dinner items...

which means I make something for me.

I am easier to please.

I grab a bunch of lettuce, 

some lunch meat, some cheese and whatever

and dip it in homemade honey mustard.

Sometimes I eat the same leftovers I had for lunch.

Sometimes I have cereal.

Sometimes I have gluten-free oatmeal.

Whatever...

I don't really care.

BUT...

when Paul is home...

he cooks wonderful, magical things!

The other night he made fish tacos and beef tacos

 and Mexican rice! Yummmm!

He makes delicious soups in massive quantities so I have

plenty of leftovers for the week, which is super helpful!

So... there you have it.

A glimpse into our meal-time "routine"!

Any other tips you have are very welcome!!

Snowflake Sweatshop

I love paper snowflakes!!

Clearly, I have passed along this love.

I have my own sweatshop now!

Mwoohoohoohahaha!!

Perhaps it IS beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Self-care??

There are women out there in the world

who make it look easy.

Some of them have twice as many kids

as I have, and the photos I see online and in magazines

look like they have a team of tiny fairies flittering

around their homes all day picking up stray socks,

dog fur clumps, dust bunnies, and dropped cheerios.

I am not that woman.

I currently have socks on my coffee table

because I probably picked them up off of the carpet and 

then laid them down when I picked up 

something else.

I have not vacuumed today 

(and we have 7 kids and a giant furry beast of a dog).

I have unfolded laundry curing in my rocking chair

more in the washer and dryer and still more waiting to get washed.

I didn't bother to make my bed this morning.

Or most any other morning.

Because, seriously...

who is going to see it??

(Hi, Mom... sorry. But it's true.)

So, when my friend Jamey gave me a blog topic

of "self-care"

("You know, how you take care of yourself so you don't burn out")

I thought she might be losing her mind.

Take care of myself???

Seriously??

Ha.

There was this one day that I thought I was going to be all

organized and stuff...

so I made myself a "to-do" list.

Vacuum

Dishes

Take boxes to garage

put summer clothes in attic

change sheets on beds

fold laundry

put laundry away

shower

clean hallway chalkboard

declutter toys in playroom

bring potted plants inside

And do you see the problem??

Other than the dead plant on my porch...

I didn't get to cross of "shower" on my list.

So my sarcastic genius friend Jamey tells me

to write a post about my PLAN for self-care then.

Ah HA!

Another to-do list.

Since I am clearly in need of such a plan...

FINE.

I'll give it a go.

Honestly, it is HARD to think about taking care of

yourself when you have 7 kids, a husband and a dog.

It's hard to carve out a few minutes to do something

that puts energy back into ME because I know there is 

the ever growing list of things everyone ELSE needs.

The laundry that never ends...

The dishes that multiply like caged rabbits...

The homework...

The floors...

The toys...

The piles of books, paper, magazines, catalogs..

The THINGS that everyone leaves all over the place...

Those things all sabotage any plans I have of taking care of ME.

What this leads to is...

bitterness,

discontentment,

anger,

frustration,

self-pity

and 

irritability.

Who likes those things?

Not me.

SO.

A plan.

A realistic plan.

I'm thinking that for starters:

• I will eat breakfast before 9am.
• I will take my vitamins regularly (working towards every day).
• I will get dressed with shoes on and be prepared for whatever comes up.
• I will use nap time wisely (shower, relaxing project, etc) and to my advantage.
• I will plan menus since meals are a constant stress on my brain.
• I will make chore lists for the kids and stop feeling bitter about them not helping with things I have not asked them for help with. I know they don't pick up anything unless told, so I need to just write it down and stop feeling frustrated.

I know...

It's no major breakthrough...

but I think it will help.

No promises, but I MIGHT decide to make my bed, too.

Yokay?

The truth about adopting "older" kids

is that they do have baggage.

You were right all along!

They come with their own circumstances,

their own ideas,

their own opinions,

their own tastes,

their own memories,

their own fears,

their own everything.

And then you plunk them down in the middle

of YOUR ideas,

your opinions,

your tastes,

your memories,

your fears,

your everything.

And sometimes things clash.

Sometimes you just flat out FORGET.

You wake up one morning and you FORGET

that you are dealing with small people with baggage.

It's easier than you might think.

I forget that they have witnessed sickness.

I forget that they know all about death

and disease

and suffering

and hunger.

And I go and get sick.

Achy back, coughing, losing-my-voice, 

feel like just sleeping all day...

sick.

And I'm missing my other half this week.

I stumble through the day...

trying to keep things under some

semblance of control.

I realize I am getting worse,

not better,

no matter how many bottles of 

magical vitamins I consume.

I let the oldest make 

PB&J for dinner,

I slice the apples.

I haphazardly do teeth brushing

and pajamas

and be sure not to kiss them on their lips

as I say goodnight

even though I always do.

I walk into the hall coughing

and trying to catch my breath.

And there is this little voice.

"Mommy... Nay!"

He needs me.

He needs me to feel secure,

to feel comforted,

he needs me to be near

so he can fall asleep

and know he is safe

and secure

and loved.

So I delay my plans of a blissfully

early bedtime

with the heating pad,

some ibuprophen, 

and perhaps some cough syrup concoction...

and I go sit next to my baby.

He immediately stops crying once I enter the room

and just says "Mommy, stay?"

How can I not?

When the cough returns

he sits straight up in the bed.

"Yokay?"

"Mommy... yokay?"

Is it fear in his voice?

Is it concern?

He was so little when he would have witnessed

the trauma that brought him into our lives...

does he somehow remember?

"I'm okay, baby. Go to sleep."

"Yokay? Mommy yokay?"

"Yes, Mommy is okay. 

Lay down..."

He asks about Daddy...

He's at work.

Minutes pass.

He's watching me.

I breathe shallow, slow breaths

to try to keep from coughing.

"It's okay, baby. Go to sleep."

Then I start to feel his body relax into his bed,

his breathing gets slower and deeper

and I know he is finally

able to relax

and sleep.

So now I drown myself in potions,

magical lotions,

syrups and pills...

and pray that I am better tomorrow.

Last year

December 3, 2009

After the emotional couple of weeks we had experienced...

the super "high" of finally applying to an agency...

the super "low" of finding out the normal wait times had doubled

between the day we faxed our application and the day we got our packet of info...

and the "low" of wondering "NOW what?!?"...

After those things had settled a bit...

Someone asked me if we had considered "Waiting Children".

Believing they were all going to be teenagers with 

super difficult emotional issues we weren't prepared to deal with... 

we had not considered "Waiting Children".

Well... my curiosity got the best of me.

I googled "agencies with Waiting Child listings".

And what I found...

after mere hours of searching a few agency websites

was this:

Clockwise from top left... #5, #6 and Baby Boy #7.

They were tiny.

They were precious.

And they were perfect!

One year ago today...

It's amazing.